Forgive to Heal
If you forgive people their wrongdoing,
your heavenly Father will forgive you as
well.
Matthew 6:14
Many
people I talk to say the same things when it comes to forgiving those who have
hurt them… I am just not ready…. I just can’t let it go…. I can’t just forget
about it… How can I just let him off the hook like that?
Perhaps
the most important thing to understand about forgiveness is that it has very
little to do with the offender. Since our God is so committed to us as individuals,
He deals with us individually. Our Lord wants us to know that our personal freedom
is at stake in our unforgiveness. God will deal with the offenders and we are
to deal with our own feelings of offense. Offense can lead to unforgiveness and
unforgiveness will lead to bitterness that will separate us from God and His
grace. It will control and consume us.
There is no need for an
apology in order to forgive, because forgiveness is not about the other person.
There is no need for a sudden loss of memory, because we do not have to forget
the incident in order to forgive. There is no need for a “feeling” of readiness
in order to forgive, because forgiveness is a choice not a feeling. Forgiveness
is not saying what someone did was OK, or letting them off the hook… God deals
with individuals and will deal with them on His terms. He just wants us to be
free from the bondage of bitterness in relation to that event or incident.
Forgiveness is an act
of obedience, a choice to be free… plain and simple. We can choose to be angry
and hold a grudge, become bitter and separated from God, or we can choose to
forgive. We have experienced forgiveness even though we did not deserve it, and
we are expected to do the same. We cannot wait to “heal” first and then forgive
because forgiveness is the beginning of healing.
Challenge: Ask God to reveal to you any
unforgiveness in your heart and choose to forgive. Decide that your healing
will begin today.
