Forgive to Heal

If you forgive people their wrongdoing,

your heavenly Father will forgive you as well.

Matthew 6:14

                Many people I talk to say the same things when it comes to forgiving those who have hurt them… I am just not ready…. I just can’t let it go…. I can’t just forget about it… How can I just let him off the hook like that?

            Perhaps the most important thing to understand about forgiveness is that it has very little to do with the offender. Since our God is so committed to us as individuals, He deals with us individually. Our Lord wants us to know that our personal freedom is at stake in our unforgiveness. God will deal with the offenders and we are to deal with our own feelings of offense. Offense can lead to unforgiveness and unforgiveness will lead to bitterness that will separate us from God and His grace. It will control and consume us.   

There is no need for an apology in order to forgive, because forgiveness is not about the other person. There is no need for a sudden loss of memory, because we do not have to forget the incident in order to forgive. There is no need for a “feeling” of readiness in order to forgive, because forgiveness is a choice not a feeling. Forgiveness is not saying what someone did was OK, or letting them off the hook… God deals with individuals and will deal with them on His terms. He just wants us to be free from the bondage of bitterness in relation to that event or incident.

Forgiveness is an act of obedience, a choice to be free… plain and simple. We can choose to be angry and hold a grudge, become bitter and separated from God, or we can choose to forgive. We have experienced forgiveness even though we did not deserve it, and we are expected to do the same. We cannot wait to “heal” first and then forgive because forgiveness is the beginning of healing.  

Challenge: Ask God to reveal to you any unforgiveness in your heart and choose to forgive. Decide that your healing will begin today.